License Invoked, by Robert Aspirin and Jody Lynn Nye (Baen, 2001)

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They’re not Mully and Sculder, or whoever those two are. Not by a long shot. In fact, the only thing Liz Mayfield and Boo-Boo Boudreau have in common with the Dynamic Duo of the X-Files is that they’re both government agents, members of small and obscure departments devoted to dealing with the paranormal, the unusual, the inexplicable, and the occult.

Elizabeth Mayfield is from overseas, an agent for the British Government Office of Occult and Paranormal Sightings Investigation. That’s right, OOPSI. Sigh now, because it doesn’t get any less tongue-in-cheek as we go along. Her counterpart is Beauray Boudreau, better known to his friends and colleagues as “Boo-Boo,” an easygoing good old boy from New Orleans who’s a “free-lance” stringer for the FBI’s Department BBB (Bibbity-bobbity-boo, a holdover from those wild and wacky try-anything ’60s). The uptight Brit and the laid-back American are about to go head to head as they’re forced to partner on an assignment which will tax their resources to the limits, and either make or break their departments for the year.

It seems a certain -very- visible rock star, Fionna Kenmare, lead signer for the Irish acid-fold-punk-rock band Green Fire, is having some occult problems, and they’re following her on her new world tour. Poltergeists? The Fae? Psychic assault? Bad karma? Who knows, but she wants it stopped, and now. And so do the unnamed higher-ups who’ve assigned Liz Mayfield to this unorthodox (and not entirely welcome) assignment. And since the FBI wouldn’t want to be left behind, they give her their best (not really) man for the job (only one in the area, to be truthful), Boo-Boo. Dana and Fox, eat your hearts out.

There are complications. Liz and Boo-Boo don’t entirely like or trust one another. Fionna doesn’t want them around. They have to stay as unnoticed and undercover as possible, to avoid publicity. There’re more intrigues and jealousies in the band and its entourage than is healthy. Oh, and there’s a fiendish plot by SATN-TV, which proves that cable is evil, to utilize Fionna for decidedly nefarious purposes. Then there’s the fact that Liz and Fionna are old school buddies, which doesn’t please either one of them.

Things get messier and messier as the investigation into the invisible, unpredictable attacks continues. Things burst into flames, objects levitate, people vanish, and in between, Liz meets Cajun-style cooking. It’s big trouble in the Big Easy, with just two agents there to prevent a tragedy of epic proportions if Fionna’s concert goes awry, as her enemies desire.

Luckily, Liz and Boo-Boo have a few aces up their sleeves, in the form of magical spells and resources that they’ll definitely deny if caught or exposed. Liz is a practicing witch, Boo-Boo a practicing … er … something-or-other.

And when they pull in representatives of two dozen or so different religious and arcane traditions to lend them a hand, it can only get more interesting. Eighty thousand people are on the line if Liz and Boo-Boo can’t pull off a minor miracle with a little help from some friends.

Straight up, this is comic fantasy, something both Robert Aspirin (The Myth series) and Jody Lynn Nye (The Mythology 101 series, the Don’t Forget Your Spacesuit Dear anthology) are quite familiar with, and it’s as good as anything I’ve seen from either of them in a while. It’s a fun and quick read with engaging characters, a familiar-but-enjoyable premise, and plenty of potential for sequels. I’d be surprised if we didn’t see more of Boo-Boo and Liz, as the chemistry between them shines and carries the story along swiftly. This may not be the most complex or sophisticated novel of the year, but once I started it, I couldn’t put it down. It has just the right touches of quirky asides and self-effacing humor without lapsing into sophomoric hijinx or endless puns, as many comic fantasies seem to do. This book’s worth checking out, whether you’re a fan of Jody Lynn Nye, Robert Aspirin, neither or both. Here’s looking forward to more from this team.

In Legend Born, by Laura Resnick (Tor, 2000)

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An act of defiance that sows the seeds of rebellion. A man long gone from home, returned with foreign weapons and skills. A young woman possessing otherworldly blood and visions of the unknown. These are the elements which will throw the land of Sileria, a hostile and unwelcoming island nation made up of feuding, disparate ethnic elements, into utter chaos, and revolution against the decadent Valdani, who are but the latest people to hold proud Sileria under their thumb. A thousand years of Outlander control is about to be challenged, and it all starts with simple acts, and long-held prophecies.

Mirabar is a Guardian, part of an outlawed yet indispensable cult which uses fire to contact the Otherworld, and speak with the dead. Her fire-colored hair marks her as demon-blooded, outcast and distrusted even among her few friends. Plagued with visions of the future and contacted by enigmatic manifestations of what might be a god or long-dead hero, she is given a task to see a prophecy fulfilled.

Tansen, though one of the clannish and stubborn shillah, has returned to his homeland after years away, in the garb of a Moorlander and carrying the swords of a Kintish warrior, marking him as a truly dangerous man. Unwilling to surrender his weapons, unable to surrender, he comes under the scrutiny of the local Valdani commander, a man by the name of Koroll, who sees in this strange man the opportunity to rid himself of another problem.

Josarian, also of the shillah, is a man for whom the breaking point meant no longer giving in to the Valdani. Killing two of their Outlookers while on a routine black marketeering mission, he becomes an outlaw overnight, and soon parlays that status into something of a folk hero, a guerrilla fighter dedicated to nothing less than driving the Valdani out once and for all.

Sent to kill Josarian, Tansen swiftly chooses to switch loyalties, siding with his race over the unwanted Valdani. And when the two unite, they become the figureheads of a swiftly-growing movement born of vengeance and liberation. If they can unite the scattered peoples of Sileria: the mountain-dwelling shallaheen, the aristocratic toreni, the suspicious Guardians, the mighty and arrogant wizards of the Water Society, the lowlanders, and the seafolk, they just might stand a chance against the Valdani Empire, which now fights a war on several fronts and has little time or patience for the Silerian uprising.

As the story unfolds, the rebellion grows and the stakes rise. Can the disparate elements of the uprising stand together long enough to drive the Valdani out, or will infighting, treachery, long-held hatreds and distrust rend them asunder first? Jealousy will threaten Josarian; vengeance will threaten Tansen. And love will bind Mirabar to one of them, but not in the way anyone expects. And someone will undergo the ultimate test of faith, devotion, and sacrifice to fulfill a prophecy and become the instrument of a jealous goddess. But what happens when the long-awaited leader of prophecy has been dead for years?

In Legend Born weaves together a dozen different threads to tell a truly epic story of a land oppressed, a people in revolt, and would-be heroes caught up in the middle. Love, treachery, loyalty, honor, vengeance and betrayal form the basis for a story in which one man can make a difference, but it’ll take an army to make a lasting change. Sprawling, beautiful, and complex, it presents three-dimensional characters with true strength and damning flaws. Mistakes of the past will come back to haunt some, fear of the future will guide others, and only the desire to see their land free will unite them all. Picking up the pace as it proceeds, In Legend Born ends in a gripping climax that leaves no one untouched, and the way open for more tales told in this world.

While highly recommended, the book does come with this caveat: pay attention. It’s easy to get characters confused, as many of the Valdani have similar names, as do the Silerians. While these names are often indicative of their particular ethnicity or allegiance, it makes it sometimes hard to remember who’s who. That, and a constantly changing set of loyalties mixed with multi-leveled plots and conspiracies and agreements makes this book somewhat on the dense side. Plotted on a wide scale, though, it delivers a fascinating and entertaining story that will appeal to anyone who likes widescreen fantasy mixed with the Byzantine politics of such a mixed alliance. Give this one a shot.

Historical Hauntings, by Martin H. Greenberg and Jean Rabe (Daw, 2001)

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Just because you’re dead doesn’t mean you’re gone, or done with the world. In Historical Hauntings, edited by Martin Greenberg and Jean Rabe, eighteen authors dredge up stories worthy of any stormy night or campfire, tales of spectral vengeance, ambition, atonement and more. Stories of people who still have one last task to accomplish before they move on. People who can’t move on no matter what. Unfulfilled destinies, unfinished business, untold stories. And the ghosts invoked in this collection aren’t always who you’d expect. Anyone, anytime, anywhere, is fair game for this superb collection of spine-tingling and evocative ghost stories.

For instance, in Roland J. Green’s “Fighting Spirits,” the war for Iwo Jima isn’t over for General Kuribayashi, or for at least one of the many men who died on that island. The story is about honor, dignity, and purifying the spirit before moving on. Told from the viewpoint of an aging WWII Marine vet who now works for an agency too secret to be named, it sets up an interesting framework that could easily be expanded into future stories.

Stephen W. Gabriel’s “Jennie In The Field” is touching and tragic, the story of two sisters who can’t quite let go of one another until the time is right.

Science Fiction Grand Master Andre Norton weaves a gripping tale of ghosts inspired by Arthurian legend in “Ravenmere.” Morgan attempts dominance over the Ladies of the Lake, and only one enchanted reincarnation of a certain Arthurian lady stands in her way, as pawn or obstacle. James Lowder takes a different look at Arthurian legend, as one man tries to prove the true existence of Arthur, and becomes both celebrity and victim in the quest for the Grail.

Brian M. Thomsen gives us “In The Charnel House,” a profoundly disturbing and ambiguous tale inspired by the Holocaust, which plays with the senses and the nature of reality. What’s real and what’s the ghost in this story? Read it yourself to decide.

Michael A. Stackpole’s “When You’re Dead” features a magician who said he’d attempt the great escape of his career … by returning from beyond the grave. Though he doesn’t quite succeed, Harry Houdini does help one man cheat death by performing an escape even Houdini would be proud of.

John Helfers delivers a thoroughly enjoyable story set in Japan’s magical past, as a wandering wizard, his impetuous apprentice, and their enigmatic ronin companion must settle the mystery of a cursed castle, and the dangers from beyond which infest it. It’s another tale of honor, dying with dignity, and the fascinating mythology of the samurai, which sets up plenty of room for further tales featuring these characters. Easily one of my favorite stories in the book, “Spirit of Honor” is a fun read.

Janet Pack brings out “Danny’s Desire,” where a Tory spy for Washington’s army during the American Revolution is mistakenly hung. His curse reverberates through the centuries, impacting at last upon a modern-day professor, who will find a kindred soul in the young librarian who helps him to unravel the centuries-old mystery, and right the injustice.

Elizabeth Ann Scarborough’s “The Mummies of the Motorway” is an offbeat tale in which a vacationing American family has to deal with the thousands of disgruntled mummies who were ground up to make pavement for British roads during WWII. You’ll never look at mummies, cats, or truck drivers in quite the same way again. Peter Scheighofer turns in a second tale of ancient Egypt impacting on the present in “Hatshepsut’s Revenge.” Immortality isn’t always all it’s cracked up to be, and revenge can wait for millennia.

Bruce Holland Rogers shows us what happens when you invoke the wrong man’s name, when Chief Seattle comes back to deal with some ecoterrorists in “In The Chief’s Name.”

Leslie What’s “Those Taunted Lips” brings us a tale of Helen Keller … after her death. Pierce Askegren resurrects Jimmy Hoffa, while Lisanne Norman conjures up ghosts from the Battle of Hastings. Gene DeWeese spins a story of faith and Catholicism, and a ghost whose appearance is nothing short of miraculous. Tom Dupree’s protagonist still remembers the Confederate South, and his ghosts have a particularly nasty form of revenge in mind. Donald J. Bingle gives us the last message of John Lennon as it travels back through time, and Brian Hopkins touches upon the ghosts of the deep blue sea, and the lives the ocean has claimed over the years.

Chilling, touching, fascinating, these stories will make you think and shiver, and leave the lights on for a while. They take full advantage of the theme to truly explore unexpected topics, and feature some unusual protagonists. It’s another example of how rich and varied the genre can be, and how compelling stories of ghosts and the afterlife can be. Highly recommended.

Grave Peril, by Jim Butcher (Roc, September 2001)

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What do you get if you cross Sam Spade or Mike Hammer with a healthy dose of magic? Harry Dresden, the only practicing wizard in the Chicago Yellow Pages. He’s a private detective and wizard for hire who takes the cases no one else can, or will. Vampire stalking your girlfriend? Werewolves digging in the trash? Fairies stealing your dreams? Ghosts refusing to stay dead? He’s your man, and then some. And in a world where all of the above can and will happen, he’s one of the few things standing between the unspeakable terrors of the Nevernever and the unknowing public at large of the mortal world.

In his last few cases, he’s dealt with some pretty rough stuff. Demons, rogue wizards, werewolves of all kinds, and vampires. He’s been knocked around, beat up, smacked down, hit over the head, shot at, cursed, arrested, propositioned by seductively dangerous vampires, chomped on by any manner of nasty critters, and only just survived. You’d think a sane man would hang the ‘Gone Fishing’ sign on the door, and leave town. For good. But Harry’s not like that. He’s a hero, and heroes never give up. Not even when things get unspeakably bad.

Grave Peril pushes Harry to the very edge of his limits, as it continues to fill in his backstory, and flesh out his life. In addition to his skull-dwelling familiar and magical resource, Bob, he’s joined by Michael, a carpenter turned Knight of the Sword, a crusader for God’s will who wields one of the three great holy swords. It’s good, because Harry’ll need all the help he can get. Chicago’s been turned upside-down lately by a plague of restless, unpleasant ghosts, spirits, and spooks. The two are run ragged trying to keep things under control and send the spirits on to their deserved rest. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

Someone, or something, is intentionally stirring up these ghosts. It’s not the local vampires, some of whom have a real grudge to settle with Harry… is it? It’s not the wizard Harry helped bring to justice the other month… is it? It’s certainly not Lea, Harry’s treacherous Faerie (of the Sidhe variety) godmother, right? Whoever it is, they have reasons for raising havok with the dead and creating a Nightmare whose sole desire is to suck Harry’s power dry, and drive all his friends insane with spiritual torment. It’s gotta be personal.

Harry and Michael will both be tested to destruction, as the saying goes. With enemies on all sides, innocents falling victim left and right, and their enemies constantly one step ahead, it’s a sure bet someone’s dying along the way. They’ll brave the perilous etiquette of the Vampire Courts, make alliances with the people they least trust, risk losing body and soul and faith, and sacrifice the things they care for most, in order to see the world safe from the things which threaten it. Because that’s what good men do.

Once again, Jim Butcher turns in a fast-paced, breath-holding, stomach-churning mixture of pulp noir and urban fantasy. Harry’s the quintessential hard-headed hero, determined to do the right thing, no matter what the cost. He’ll risk anything for his friends, and keep going until he’s exhausted every potential, and can’t move. And even then, don’t count him out of the running. He’s Humphrey Bogart with magical spells, all tough guy with a heart of fool’s gold. Heaven help the nasty that harms someone he feels responsible for.

The plot is deftly twisted, leading us and Harry around all sorts of deadends and blind alleys, dangling clues all the way until, at the end, it all comes together in an unexpected manner. The dark and dangerous world Harry inhabits, not far removed from our own, is further explored, with the end result of leaving just enough unexplained and unresolved to make a fourth book in the series a distinct and hoped-for possibility. (In fact, I’m told that the fourth book, tentatively entitled *Summer Knight*, will further involve poor Harry in the intricate hostilities between the Summer and Winter Courts of the Fae, among other things. Holy Shades of War For The Oaks, Batman!)

Fool Moon, by Jim Butcher (Roc, 2001)

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“I never used to keep close track of the phases of the moon. So I didn’t know that it was one night shy of being full when a young woman sat down across from me in McNally’s pub and asked me to tell her all about something that could get her killed.”

With those ominous words, Jim Butcher’s hard-boiled magician-detective returns for another two-fisted, guns n’ spells adventure. Once again, Chicago’s got problems, of the sort only Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden can tackle. As the only practicing wizard in the Chicago Yellow Pages, and one of the few occult specialists the beleaguered Chicago PD Special Investigations office can call on reliably, he’s no stranger to the unusual and the macabre. But business is slow, and his trust quotient with the police is at an all-time low, thanks to some messy business from months past. (See the first book of the Dresden Files, Storm Front, for details.) Tired of Ramen noodles, Harry can’t exactly turn down a job, no matter how messy it promises to be. When Karrin Murphy, head of the Special Investigations unit, suddenly arrives, asking Harry to help investigate some murders, he again finds himself neck-deep in someone else’s problem.

Before he knows it, Harry’s got his hands full with the mundane problems of the cops and the Feds, the underworld attentions of Gentleman Johnny Marcone and his criminal organization, the -very- underworld machinations of demons, the supernatural threat of werewolves, and the simple fact that no matter which way he turns, someone wants him dead.

But who? The White Council, near-mythical ruling body of Earthly magicians? The street gang of werewolves? Gentleman Johnny Marcone? The FBI, who have a deadly secret of their own? Tera, the feral wolf-woman who’s only trying to protect her lover? Harry’s own subconscious?

As Harry goes from investigating the murders to trying to prevent more, he discovers that nothing is as simple or straightforward as it seems. Even the deduction that he’s dealing with werewolves isn’t simple, as they come in all manner of forms, from hexenwolfen to loup-garou, from werewolves to lycanthropes. Some are easy to deal with, while some are unstoppable juggernauts of flesh-shredding destruction, fuzzy Cusinarts with unending rage. The stakes get higher, the body count mounts, and Harry himself ends up on the run from the police in a desperate race against the full moon.

Before it’s over, he’ll have turned over a few rocks that were meant to be buried, find himself tempted with a financially rewarding deal with the Mob, with information regarding his long-dead mother, and with a primal power that would allow him to deal with his enemies, at the cost of his soul. It’s never easy for Harry Dresden, and even if he survives, it’ll be at the cost of a valuable friendship.

There’s a lot going for Fool Moon. It combines the best of hard-boiled detective fiction with urban fantasy, in a way that few books can do successfully. The closest analogue would be Glen Cook’s Garrett, P.I. series, and even that’s not set in our own world. The Diana Tregarde books of Mercedes Lackey also come close, but without the same Hammett/Chandleresque tone that drives Fool Moon.

The complexity of the plots that weave through this book is impressive. It’s a multi-layered murder mystery sprinkled with red herrings, false trails, and personal goals. As soon as one answer is given, another question inevitably arises. And with Harry smack-dab in the middle and honor-bound to help, he’s driven to call upon resources he never knew he had, nor wished he’d found. He’s as complex and flawed a character as any Humphrey Bogart ever played, with that same world-weary ‘what now?’ attitude, and you know he’ll never give up until he’s dead.

Of course, there’s just enough left open at the end of the book to lay down plot threads for the next in the series, which will hopefully be forthcoming relatively soon, as it’s already under contract with Roc. We’re given a perfect satisfying conclusion, and you don’t need to read Storm Front to understand this book at all. Self-contained, but part of a series, it’s just right. I wholeheartedly recommend Fool Moon as an example of what happens when you mix genres properly. In a market increasingly dominated by media tie-ins and series beginning with “Star,” it’s a refreshing change of pace.

Einstein's Refrigerator, by Steve Silverman (Andrews McMeel, 2001)

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George Washington was really the ninth President of the United States. We developed a plan to bomb Japan during World War II with explosive-laden bats. A chicken managed to live for eighteen months after having its head cut off. Einstein helped invent the refrigerator. The United States was once ruled by Emperor Norton the First. A man survived for one hundred and thirty-three days afloat on a life raft. Violet Jessup survived not one, but three disasters at sea, including the Titanic. The Citibank Tower in New York nearly collapsed, an event which could have devastated the city.

All these, and many more, are the bizarre and fascinating stories brought to light by Steve Silverman, a high school teacher who originally began collecting these useful, useless facts and events in order to entertain his students, and who later parlayed this into the popular “Useless Facts” website. For the first time, he collects some of the most outrageous, unbelievable, and downright head-shaking stories, and has put them into book form. Thrill to the amazing Molasses Flood of 1919! Gasp as Niagra Falls runs dry! Boggle at the sheer accomplishment of writing a 50,000 word novel… without using the letter “E” once! Amaze your friends with the story of Japan’s deadly paper balloons, history’s first successful intercontinental bombing mission! Blink in bewilderment at the sheer lengths to which some people will go to avoid the world, or collect on a life insurance policy! And say “That’s just not right!” when confronted with Joseph Pujol, the world’s best… farter. To say nothing of shooting chickens at airplanes, flying in a lawn chair, eating Vaseline, inventing the zipper…

I’ll admit that I’m a sucker for useless information like this. Stories so weird they have to be real. People so eccentric you appreciate your own relatively sane family all the more. Plans so mindbogglingly twisted that you -almost- wish you’d though of it first. With the very first story, of Mike the Headless Chicken, I was hooked. Before long, I was reading tidbits from the book to my wife and friends as we wandered the mall, until they hit me to make me shut up. But I couldn’t help it. Learning about the first eight Presidents of the United States, each elected for a year under the Articles of Confederation between 1781 and 1789, all but knocked me over, while reading about Michael Malloy, who seemed virtually unkillable, just intrigued me. All in all, this book probably gave me better entertainment and trivial knowledge for my money than any book in quite a while.

Each of the various stories is presented in an intelligent, conversational tone, with Silverman’s dry wit and ironic grasp of the situation coming through in living color. An extensive appendix containing Web links and additional resources allows the interested reader to go searching for more information on his own. All in all, this book is highly recommended. While it won’t make you an expert on any one topic, it’s sure to provide you with plenty of anecdotes for the next time conversation runs dry. Next time you’re on a date, and running low on topics, just turn to your companion and say, conversationally, “The man who invented Vaseline ate a spoonful every morning for good health, but I know some better uses…”

Maybe not. One thing’s for certain, this book is a great read, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. But as Steve Silverman says at the end of each story, “Useless? Useful? I’ll leave that for you to decide.”

Eccentric Circles, by Rebecca Lickiss (Ace, 2001)

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When wouldbe writer Piper Pied (her parents had a strange sense of humor, don’t ask) attends the funeral of her grandmother, Alfrieda Dickerson, she finds her life turned upside-down. Her family, it seems, has conspired to make sure that poor Piper is the one to inherit her grandmother’s house, a delightful little cottage located on the outskirts of the suburbs. It’s simply full of Alfreida’s books and papers, has a lovely front yard, and a great view of Fairy.

That’s right, Grandma Dickerson’s cottage borders between Earth and Fairy, and is actually something of a portal for the creatures that inhabit the area. Which include some very obnoxious and mischievous pixies, a too-handsome-to-be-real elf named Aelvarim, a stereotypically-crochety dwarf named Malraux, and a misogynistic wizard named Larkingtower. And yes, they’re stereotypical for a reason: they’re defined by the writings and popular beliefs of humanity. Between Tolkein and all the other fantasy writers of the past century, Fairy’s undergone some changes, not all of them for the pleasant.

What starts off as Piper’s attempt to put some order into her life soon turns into a murder mystery, as she and Aelvarim attempt to find out who killed Grandma Dickerson, and why. If they can find the missing manuscript Alfreida was working on, it might just have the answers they need. The problem is, there’s a time limit. More and more of Fairy and Earth are being swallowed up by patches of nothingness, and only those touched by Fairy can see it. Things, and people, are disappearing from existence, unmade in the blink of an eye. It’s up to Piper to unravel the mystery, and set things right in the only way she can: by influencing the world of Fairy and her own life through her writing. And maybe, just maybe, she’ll find time for romance. That is, if Aelvarim’s not the real culprit.

Metatextual and thoroughly enjoyable, Rebecca Lickiss puts a new spin on old ideas and makes sense out of the stereotypes commonly attached to fantasy. Why -should- the wizard hate women, yet secretly like them? Why -should- the dwarf sing and dig for gems in a mine? Why -must- the elves be beautiful bardic masters? What if they want to be different, and are aware of the roles they must play?

A regrettably quick read, *Eccentric Circles* still marks the debut of a talented writer with a lot of potential. I’m looking forward to seeing what she’ll put out next. With luck, Lickiss is only just getting started, and will continue to grow and improve, and tackle even more complex subjects. But when the only complaints are ‘it’s over too soon’ and ‘I wanted more’, you know she’s off to a good start.

Drinking Midnight Wine, by Simon R. Green (Roc, 2001)

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What value can one ordinary man have in a magical world? What can a mortal bring to the affairs of immortals?

When Toby Dexter impulsively follows a strange woman off the train and through a door that shouldn’t exist, he begins the final sequence of events aimed towards destroying all that is, and all that could be, and upsetting the delicate balance between the mundane and the magical. It all starts out of love, and it’ll end in hatred and vengeance, unless Toby’s able to make the right choices in a very difficult world.

Gone is the safe mortal world he once knew. Overnight, he’s become a key player, a legendary “focal point” in the supernatural world of Mysterie, which exists alongside the real world of Veritie. And everyone seems to know much more than he does. For love of the dismissive, capricious, enigmatic Gayle, Toby will do just about anything. He’ll challenge trolls, venture into the realms of the dead, spit in the eye of a demi-god, face off against the Serpent’s Son, and alter the course of destiny.

Something terrible and strange and catastrophic is about to go down in Mysterie. Why else would Nicholas Hob, also known as the Serpent’s Son, and Heaven’s fallen stormtrooper, Angel, be in town? Why would the Reality Express be delivering a frantic load of refugees from Mysterie to Veritie? Why would the immortal riddle known as the Waking Beauty have put Jimmy Thunder, God for Hire and last descendant of Thor, on the case? Why would the beautiful but tragically addled Luna stir from her exile? And just who — or what — is Gayle? There’s a lot of questions, and the answers won’t please anyone.

By the time it’s over, Gayle and Toby, Jimmy, Hob and Angel, Luna and Leo Morn, reluctant hero, will converge for a fateful showdown to decide the fate of Mysterie and Veritie both. This is bigger than the mortal world of science and rationalization. This is vaster than the supernatural world of magic, myth, mystery, angels, gods, Powers and Dominations. This is so big, so inconceivably entangled in the warp and way of the worlds, that it’ll take a normal man in love to decide what will happen in the end.

The dead will walk, god and fallen angels will do battle, the King of Cats will choose sides, and an ancient creature will rise from his earthen prison, and all will be decided, in Drinking Midnight Wine, the novel from best-selling author Simon R. Green. Best known for his New York Times bestselling Deathstalker series, an epic and visceral space opera, and for his grim and gritty tales of fantasy gone twisted, he turns his attentions towards urban fantasy, evocative of Neil Gaiman … if someone had spiked Neil’s drinks and read him some Lovecraft before bed. Part Neverwhere, part American Gods, Drinking Midnight Wine comes off as their bastard, disreputable, tongue-in-cheek, and slightly deranged cousin, a creature all unto itself. Mysterie comes alive against a backdrop of ancient rivalries and hatreds, the suggestion of dark secrets and darker horrors, and the power of one man’s love in an unpredictable world.

I’ve long enjoyed Simon Green’s books (see other reviews at here and over there on this site), and I actually jumped the gun to order my copy of Drinking Midnight Wine from the UK, months before the American version was released. It was well worth it. Green excites, entertains, and kicks serious ass as always, managing to go from bone-shiveringly horrifying just through sheer suggestion to laugh-out-loud (nervously) funny. Green can convey the possibility of blasphemous, obscene horrors with a single sentence, or powers beyond imagination with a few words, and then turn around to deliver crisp, cinematic fight scenes as over-the-top as any Hong Kong movie. His true power lies in his words, letting us imagine what kind of being “Sweet Susie Slaughter” or “Nasty Jack Starlight” or “The Painted Ghoul” might be without actually giving us the details.

Green possesses a unique but catchy style, combining the cheerful excesses of the pulp novels with the crawling horrors of Lovecraft and the dark urban fantasy of Emma Bull or Neil Gaiman, and giving it an extra twist for good measure. Drinking Midnight Wine is, if not his best novel, certainly one of his most enjoyable, and highly recommended. My only regret is finishing it so quickly. Now what will I read?

Dead Until Dark, by Charlaine Harris (Ace, 2001)

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Sookie Stackhouse has a small problem: she’s a telepathic barmaid in a small Louisiana town. When you can read minds, you don’t tend to date much, if at all. In fact, youtend to know way too much about what people are thinking, even when you don’t want to. But that’s nothing compared to Bill Compton’s problem: he’s a vampire. When the two meet, it’s trouble for everyone involved, especially after you throw in Sookie’s friends and coworkers, vampire groups (nicknamed fang-bangers), vampire hunters, big-city vampires with loose morals, and a serial killer that’s striking a little too close to home for comfort.

When Bill walks into Merlotte’s Bar in Bon Temps, Louisiana, he immediately gains Sookie’s undivided attention. Not just because he’s a vampire, who’ve gained the same sort of outted status as gays and lesbians in this slightly off-kilter take on the world, but because he’s one of the very few people whose mind she can’t read. Attracted to him for the very reason that he’s a mystery and safe from her abilities, Sookie gets caught up in Bill’s world all too quickly. First by protecting him from some nasty people out to bleed him dry for their own purposes, and then by outright dating him. Needless to say, most normal folks, Sookie’s enigmatic boss and owner of the bar, Sam Merlotte, disapprove of this relationship. But what does she care? They all call her Crazy Sookie anyway.

After that, things get hectic. One of Sookie’s coworkers is found dead, in a way which implicates a vampire, if not Bill specifically. Soon, the murder is tied in to at least one other identical death, and then another. Bill, though protesting innocence, is still targeted as a suspect. And we all know what frightened humans do to things that they distrust… Can we say torch party?

Add into this Bill’s former friends, a group of unsavory vampiric characters drifting through town, with all of his powers and none of his ethics, and a real taste for the wild side. Then toss in a brain-damaged vampire named Bubba, who can’t stand to be reminded of his mortal life… but that sure would explain all those sightings of a man supposedly dead of a drug overdose. Then stir what might very well be a werewolf. And Sookie’s right in the middle, trying to figure out who killed those women, before she becomes the next victim. Suddenly, she’s wishing for the quiet life she used to have.

This is a book which, frankly, shouldn’t work. It’s a romantic Southern vampire murder mystery with a telepathic barmaid as the narrator, set in Lousiana. It’s the backwoods, smalltown, slightly inbred cousin to Laurell K. Hamilton’s Anita Blake series, and with so many disparate elements being thrown into one pot, it’s a wonder any of them survive. But survive, and thrive, they do. I said that this book shouldn’t work, so the surprise is that it does. It’s fun, accessible, and quirky, possessing a cynical sense of humor and a wry outlook on life. It flouts convention with a vampire named Bill, a vampire club named Fangtasia, and the aforementioned fang-banging groupies who get high on the experience and the romantic lure of the supernatural. It’s a fun read, thoroughly enjoyable in a down-to-Earth manner. This isn’t the poetic sensuality of Anne Rice, or the earthy complexity of Laurell K. Hamilton, or the hard-boiled adventure of Tanya Huff. This is a take on the vampire mythos I can’t remember seeing before, and it’s a refreshing reminder that we haven’t completely tapped out that vein yet. We’ve seen vampire romances, vampire mysteries, vampire detectives, and just about everything else, but in this case, it’s the crockpot blending of the various ingredients that makes *Dead Until Dark* something a little different, and a good deal of fun.

So if you like vampires, want something that’s not the usual Gothic lace-and-creamy-throats, and have a few hours to kill, you can do a lot worse than to give this book a shot. The author, also known for her straight mystery series set in the town of Shakespeare, has crossed over the genre lines successfully, and with luck we’ll see more books about Sookie and Bill. (And Bubba!)

Corsair, by Chris Bunch (Aspect, 2001)

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Adventure and change are in young Gareth Radnor’s blood. The desire to get out and see the world often conflicts with the stay-at-home wishes of his mage father and loving mother. Along with his steadfast friend, Knoll N’b’ry, Gareth wants nothing more than to see the world, leaving his seaside home as a deepwater sailor, or pirate. But when tragedy strikes, and the reviled Linyati slavers attack Gareth’s home and slaughter all but a few, Gareth finds more adventure than even he could imagine. He, Knoll, and their fellow friend and survivor Thom Tehidy find new homes with those willing to take them in, with Gareth going to live with his uncle’s family in the town of Ticao. There, Gareth finds new friends: the adventurous and tomboyish Cosyra, and the huge Labala.

Life in Ticao is, if anything, duller, with Gareth finding a trade as a clerk in his uncle’s mercantile empire. Yawn. Surely not what the young man was looking for. With his friends, he engages in mischief and pranks when the mood is right and the night allows, wreaking havoc in the city, and occasionally harassing the Linyati slavers when they dare come into the city to conduct business. But this life can’t last forever.

A chance encounter, a prank gone awry, and a noble is dead, Gareth responsible and imprisoned. Only bitter fortune and capricious luck prevent him from meeting his death at the headsman’s axe, or worse; the king’s disfavor regarding the man he killed and that man’s patron is just enough to spare Gareth’s life. But to prevent further difficulty, Gareth’s uncle secures him a place aboard a merchant vessel. He’s going to sea at long last, even if not in the manner he expected. So begins an adventure that’ll lead to glory, fame, and war.

As months pass, Gareth learns much of the sea, becoming a sailor in truth as well as disposition, absorbing all he can of the knowledge and ways of that life. Years pass, and he becomes quite accomplished, a skilled fighter and a masterful sailor, assuming more responsibilities, and indulging his hatred of the Linyati when and as he finds them. At last he returns home, where he once more hooks up with his old friends, Thom and Knoll, and then with Cosyra. Life is good.

Good, but not dull. As preparations are made for Gareth, Thom, and Knoll to embark upon a new journey as crew above the Steadfast, old enemies reemerge and put Gareth and Cosyra in dire jeopardy. Once more, Gareth finds himself fleeing the scene of violence, and seeks refuge at sea, this time with his friends backing him up. The sails are raised, the wind is right, and the voyage begins in earnest.

Only to run into complication after complication: death, betrayal, dark dealings, slavery, and mutiny. Before he knows it, Gareth’s assumed control of the Steadfast and its unorthodox cargo, and is leading its crewmen on a violent path of vengeance and piracy against the Linyati, freeing their slaves, stealing their ships, and claiming their treasure. Their success spreads, their names on everyone’s lips, their deeds legendary. But when they return home, it’s to be treated as criminals, guilty of treason, imprisoned at once as an object lesson. Life is not good.

But it’s hard to keep Gareth Radnor down. Finding favor in the eyes of the king, wanted dead by the Linyati, Gareth is granted power, prestige, a title, land. It’s not enough. Gareth has other plans. And once they’re put into motion, he and his friends will journey deep into the heart of the Linyati territory, to attack them head-on, and take prizes of incalculable wealth. The undertaking promises treasure, ships, and more adventure than ever before. If he survives this voyage, he’ll strike a blow against the Linyati, learn one of their deadliest secrets, and lose someone dear to him. But if he doesn’t survive, hundreds will die with him. It’s the seafaring adventure of a lifetime for the young man, and he’ll live it to the fullest.

Corsair is a good, salty, wind-in-the-sails, swashbuckling, cutlass-swinging, ship-sinking, battle-filled, rousing maritime escapade on a scale to make Errol Flynn or Douglas Fairbanks green with envy. It’s fast-paced, exciting, and fun all the way, with larger-than-life characters and a tight plot that bounces from one thrill to the next. Gareth is a thoroughly entertaining protagonist, and his friends provide the perfect backdrop and accompaniment for his exploits. It’s fantasy with just the right twist, taking it out to sea where magic and monsters await, as well as the thrill of the hunt and the joys of victory and booty.

Luckily, while the book has a satisfying ending, it leaves itself open to further exploration, all but promising that we’ll hear more of Gareth Radnor and his comrades and crew. As long as Bunch can keep the balance of character development and all-out action steady, this could very well be a fun series. Corsair is recommended, not just for fantasy lovers, but for those who have the call of the sea in their blood.